Damn…. Another day has passed by and I’m still single. Who would of thought that a beautiful “Black Queen” like myself would still be single. I know what you’re thinking. I’m a little cocky or I’m just full of myself. Nah….I just know my worth and I have standards and I refuse to settle for anything less. That’s right, yea I said it. I refuse to be made a fool of. If you’re a black guy or any type of guy reading this, you probably have the misconception that I’m a angry bitter black woman that curves a lot of men. Nah honey, trust that’s not even close to the story I’m about to tell you why I’m the way I am. Oh by the way, my name is Andrea if you was wondering.
Now back to story time. I’ve two beautiful children, one boy and one girl who I love to death and as a mother for all you ladies out there, you know that you have to be mindful and careful who you let in your kids life, because that can play a pivotal role in having them getting to know a guy that is only temporary. Also if any of you were wondering, I’m separated from my previous husband and I’ve been out there on the dating block getting to know most men but most guys have told me that I’m to intimidating because I make and earn more than they do and they find that as a strike to not be interested in me. Most of the guys that adhere to this ideology, told me that , they’re more traditional, where they want a woman to stay home and cook and clean and watch the children. When I told them that it would be a cold day in hell, if that were to occur. When they heard those words, they got offended and stormed off. But let me ask you this, put yourself in my shoes. If you were the mother of two children and a guy told you to quit your job and to stay home doing house duties while he makes all the money and all of a sudden he decides he doesn’t want to be with you anymore, so he leaves. What does that do to you? It makes you a woman that is homeless with two children out on the street with no money, because you believed in a guy that promised you that he would take care of you and your kids, and now he left you with nothing to fend for yourself. Don’t get me wrong I’m not saying that all men are like this, their are some great men out there. It’s just the ones I encountered, I’m just showing you from a black woman’s perspective, that when we say that we are a strong independent black woman, we don’t use that phrase to scare you off. But we use that phrase to show you men that we can provide for ourselves, so that a situation like I just mentioned doesn’t occur and we want to make sure that if we bring you around our kids that you plan to with us along time instead of trying to have a one night stand which will never happen with me, because I’ve respect for myself and I value my body.
So when a black woman or any woman in general ask you to go on a first date or to meet somewhere in public, we are basically trying to tell you, like hey show me that you’re interested in me and not just trying to dick me down. We are saying that, because deep down we don’t want to be somebody’s baby mother, we really want to be a wife and we want to help encourage our man, not tear him down and degrade him, but to uplift him and build a empire together, so we can both flourish and have a ravishing and great life that we can pass down to our kids and our future grand kids and their children also. That’s what us as black women really want, when we are talking you men, particularly black men. As a black woman it hurts me to see my strong, handsome black men date outside our race and putting our black women down, because we are to dark skin or not light skin enough for them to take serious or the notion we are loud or full of drama which is a lie. We already have to put up with societal crap, that portrays black women as angry or not light skin enough to be taken serious. Not to mention four hundred years of slavery we had to take care of the family and the black man to, but thats a topic for another day. You get the point. But also let me clarify that there’s nothing wrong with dating outside your race, you love who you love, I’m just saying it would be nice to see a strong black couple be together and flourish together financially and spiritually. In my opinion when most black women say they have high standards, we are alluding to that fact, that we want the best for you, where we motivate each other to become successful in both our goals and we just want you to respect us and to come correct and have something to put on the table besides dick, where we can get that anytime we want. So if me having standards is considered to be most men as being a angry, stuck up, bitter black woman, then I smile with pride knowing that I have respect for myself and that the gentlemen that is approaching me at the moment in time, knows that he’s looking at a beautiful black queen, that’s going to motivate him to be his very best and to have high standards for himself also. My name is Andrea and I’m a beautiful, intelligent black queen AKA “SOULS SISTA” and this is my resolve.
PS- Ladies remember, having high standards is not stuck, it’s about respecting yourself showing your potential male flirt that you can motivate them also, so they can hold their-selves to high standards as well! Thanks for reading queens, you are my “SOUL SISTA!”